


IKEA Moments

by owlbsurfinbird



Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, IKEA, Implied Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 09:08:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2616245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/owlbsurfinbird/pseuds/owlbsurfinbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>...shopping for a Snitsig, they came across a Rodtoppa...</p>
            </blockquote>





	IKEA Moments

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to sciencepuppy for the quick beta-read.

When looking at the website isn't enough, sometimes you have to venture into IKEA...

“It’s—“ Robbie looked carefully at the tag. “It’s a Gonad.”

James turned, disbelief on his face. “I am sure that IKEA checked—“ He stared at the tag dangling from the furniture. “You need glasses. Gorad. Not gonad.”

Robbie made a face. “Why don’t they call it a white bookshelf.”

“It’s too small. We need a wall unit.” Hathaway put his hands on his hips as he contemplated the bookshelf. He cocked his head. “Maybe we could hack some Billy shelves.”

“If we’re going to cut things into pieces we might as well build the shelves from scratch like I said.”

“The books will be on the floor in stacks for months while you finish.”

“Oi! I’m retired, got nothing better to do.”

James raised an eyebrow and walked to the next area, as organized and pristine as the previous display.

“If you help me, it would go faster.” 

James pretended to consider this. “Power tools, remember?”

Robbie rubbed his neck, dropped his hand. “Yeah, right. But that was a proper garden shed with precision bits, not a bloody bookshelf.”

“It was a kit.”

“It was a nightmare,” said Robbie, under his breath. “Here we go. Fucking shelving unit.”

“Excuse me?”

“Right there, made of steel. Fucking.”

James checked the tag. “Fjalkinge.” He put his hands in his pockets. “You hate this, don’t you?”

Robbie shrugged. “Just want them to call it what it is. What was the other thing you were looking for?”

“A Snitsig.” James pursed his lips together, trying not to laugh. “It’s a pot.”

Robbie followed the signs past the furniture displays for living areas. They came to the bedroom displays. “Feel like I’m being herded.” He passed the bedding and stopped. “Maybe we need a Glansfeel.”

“Glansvide. Are you saying we need a new comforter?”

“Aye.” Robbie gave him an impish grin. “A Rodtoppa.”

James checked the tag. “It is a Rodtoppa.” He blushed. “No. Can't be. Did you see this?” He pointed to an odd shaped lamp on the austere nightstand beside the bed.

“It’s an ugly lamp.”

“Read the tag.”

“Felch? What’s that?” Robbie’s eyes narrowed.

“Gonad. Fucking. Glansfeel. Rodtoppa. Felch.” James smiled, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a bit of a wicked grin. He bit his lower lip. “Robbie. Let’s go home.

“Right. Let’s go get your Snitsig.” Lewis chuckled. “And I’ll make the shelving unit.”

**Author's Note:**

> All of these are real IKEA items except for 'felch' which was the word someone dared me to use in a fic.


End file.
